It begins...

Well, it has been a while since the last one - the trip to Scotland with just the boys.  That was the summer of 2018 - Jess was pregnant with Isla and I was changing jobs to the school I am at now.  

In between, there have been numerous small trips - Jess and Isla went to Wales with her mom and family friends while the boys, Grappa and I went on our 8 stadium baseball tour.  Of course, wedged in there was fucking Covid and all of the bullshit that came along with that.

Ok, before we continue, I should probably say this blog is not for you if:

• You don't like cursing;
• You are easily offended;
• You are inflexibly politically correct and don't understand context;
• You can't handle reality.

This blog is for you if:

• You want to know what it is like to travel with four very strong willed kids;
• You would like to test the limits of your own marriage vicariously through us;
• You appreciate being told the truth and the raw emotions that come with it; 
• You know family dynamics are messy, especially when you have four very strong willed kids;
• You recognize that random crazy shit will come out of kids' mouthes based on what they see - and we document it, as is.  No apologies and no regrets.

If any of this scares you, stop reading now.  Seriously.  If you continue to read, keep your judgements to yourself.  

It is Super Bowl Sunday morning here and it snowed.  My hip, neck and back are a mess, so I am hoping that the strapping young lads we created will get the snow cleared up very quickly, but since 2/3 of them are on the couch and one is outside and says he is going to do something but will quickly be redirected by whatever is going on outside, I do not have much hope.  If you are watching the game today and you are from NY and you root for Philly, just give up your NY card and move there.  More importantly, Liverpool play Plymouth-Argyle in the FA Cupat 10 and I will soon be redirected as well.

I have already been scolded by Jess because I have started the blog before she bought plane tickets.  She says I never do that and I am going to jinx it.  I don't think so because if you know Jess, she is already obsessed with this trip and she's one to talk since she bought "trip clothes" for the kids.  We haven't even bought fucking tickets yet.  And while we are on her obsessive behavior - let's talk.  And to be transparent this is on the table for public consumption because she said to me yesterday, "You know I am going to be unbearable for the next six months."   I said, "What, talking and me incessantly about the trip? (Even when I am not listening)."  To which she replied, "Yes."  

I will be in trouble for this picture...I am not comfortable with her proximity to me at this juncture.

In addition to clothing, she has also started with:  a book on how to travel to get some of the best deals and what you need to do to find them, including daily searches, using points and then being willing to go to other spots that you maybe were not thinking about at the start - this way you can get the best prices.  I say the five of them can go in coach and I get first class.  Now in addition to the trip spots we are discussing the potential lay over spots, which currently include Iceland and London and this could be on the way there or on the way back.  No one knows.

But I guess before we talk about locations, we should probably talk about how we got here and why we might go where we might go.  Neil is thirteen now and really enjoys ancient history and so, he has been thinking about things he would like to see  - and I am sure has seen multiple things online regarding locations.  He really wants to see the Colosseum in Rome, along with the Forum and he wants to see Pompeii.  He also wants to see Athens and the crystal blue waters of the Greek Islands.  Then along comes Malcolm - "I want to see Venice."  Now, I have been to both twice (Jess maybe 3 times).  I am not against visiting them again, but to be fair, Venice is cool to see but it's not worth much of the time for it's location.  Rome is - so it could be a first stop or something.  The monkey wrench #2 Jess throws out - "I'd like to go to Chinque Terre again."  Don't get me wrong - it is cool to hike the trails and see the five villages but it is nowhere near anything else.  And so, the hot mess begins....where, when and what else.

I personally would like to go at least one place I have not been and so suggested that we look at Croatia since it is across the water from Italy.  And this is a definite possibility - checking out Split, Dubrovnik and the caves in the north (highly recommended).  So there are some natural routes that can be taken to kind of loop around or start at Venice, Rome and then across or the other way around.  Oh yeah - then we also talked about who might be joining us on the way and for different portions of the trip - Jess' friend Jen from Australia, Jess' parents...anyone else?

This is going to be a difficult trip to manage for a few reasons from a work related perspective:  I have to work other vacation days to get more days because we will be at the beach in Florida for a week; I will have to have someone enter summer promotional decisions into the computer because I will be overseas and I have to make sure that I can efficiently get everything done in the time that I have in the building - which is difficult under normal circumstances since I get very easily distracted with the summer bug and want to be there as little as possible.  This shouldn't be a problem with ALL the time I have on the weekends.  (That's sarcasm).  

Now, if you know my kids, you can understand the reservations I have with two of them in major cities like Rome.  Barring a leash, it is going to be more than stressful keeping track of them.  Say what you want - but some of the more shady elements of society would probably be able to fetch a good price for the blondies - and if I am going to go to jail in Europe, Italy might be the best place.  However, given past trips, one of them is likely to get arrested before me for climbing on 2000 year old ruins.

This is where we are - Jess is making something to eat, I am watching the Liverpool game - 20 min in and no score WTF.  Stay tuned because I have a feeling that with the break coming for President's Week, things are going to escalate very quickly.